Now, I'm exercising great, great restraint right now. Serious self-censorship. Because while I want nothing more than to vent righteously about an interaction that I had with Rick, the IT guru at my work, I also don't dare because I'm frankly not interested in losing my job because I posted about it all. So, I'll write about what DIDN'T happen on Friday.

My computer WASN'T working right, because it DIDN'T have the right video driver installed. So I COULDN'T fix it myself, not being an administrator account. I sent in a work order to have it fixed, and I DIDN'T get a reply or a warning before my computer magically began operating itself. I DIDN'T assume that it was my work order being processed, because I am gol-durned certain that my work order did NOT include a request to change the wallpaper on my desktop from plain blue to a pretty picture of ocean waves or to rearrange all of my icons. So I tried to use the mouse to open Notepad or Word to ask, "What's going on?" and that DIDN'T make the tech on the other end happy.

I got a nasty email, suggesting that I NOT play "mouse wars" (oh, the marketing possibilities) when I was the one who had asked for help in the first place. I replied as calmly and professionally as I was able to - that is, I DIDN'T list off the ways in which the situation could have been improved. To which I got a nasty email in reply, careful to remind me that my "Favorites" list had been checked and I was clearly using work resources for personal use and that WASN'T allowed. And that my supervisor HADN'T been informed, BUT....

I just love being threatened by a "but." Especially since my supervisor already knew, since I'd been copying her on the emails and had spoken to her about it.

Long story short, Rick was less and less warm and fuzzy as the day wore on, and my supervisor finally stepped in and squelched it. For which I'm grateful - I had made the decision not to reply anymore, but how can you not-reply without telling them that you're not-replying, which is in itself a reply? Oh, the conundrums. (Conundra?)

I would so love to simply post the email thread here, in full. But, for one thing, it's way too long. I mean, really. I know I use a lot of words, but get this - *I* was actually the taciturn one in this particular exchange. And for another, if I do, I think that would cross the line from vague references to gloating unprofessionally. But at least, with a name like Rick (which, incidentally, is not his name. But the joke still works with "Rick," so we'll just stay there, okee-dokee?), he has opened himself to a lovely and catchy nickname.

And, the supreme irony? Once, long, long ago, in a previous life, I actually WAS an IT guru. At IBM, no less. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.